I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
Randomize
