you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize
