idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
Randomize
