I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
