How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize