Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
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