I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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Best friends brother. Beat that.
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize