i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
