hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Randomize
