Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
Randomize
