you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
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