There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
i've created a new STD.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
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