I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Randomize
