i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
Randomize