worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
Randomize
