that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
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