i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
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