I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
Randomize
