Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
3 2 1 whiskey
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
Randomize
