I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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