ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
Randomize
