i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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