he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
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