She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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