This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
