My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
I intend to get homeless drunk
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
Randomize
