There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
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