: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
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