He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
