Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
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