Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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