I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
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