ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
Listen. The next time my first idea in the morning is "hometown buffet and a water bottle full of captain morgan", please make me go back to sleep.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
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