You really coming over, don't trick.
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
