Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
Randomize