D3 body, D1 cock
My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
Randomize
