Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
All I want is dick and wine.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Randomize
