It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Randomize
