drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
