Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
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