Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Randomize