You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Randomize
