Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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