so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
