Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
I think im going to throw up on grandma
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
Randomize
