If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
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