pedialite and red bull = repair kit
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
