Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
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