we're blogging at a bar
I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
look no pants
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
I just added a bunch of arbitrary options to my ouija board. Ghosts can now tell me "cheddar," "the homosexual agenda," "the whole foods vegan aisle," or "viable offspring"
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
Randomize
