i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize