I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
Randomize
